I meant to tack on another train of thought to my previous/most recent post:
Becoming attached to stories happens in lots of ways. In the context of open relationships, it is common to hear someone say "I am a jealous person, so X, Y, Z is hard for me." Say that over and over, and you really start to believe that. How is anything else possible then?
Putting aside our thought patterns and stories can be so uncomfortable. Giving space to alternative possibilities is scary. Trying to imagine other possibilities is a big unknown. But if you practice thinking new thoughts, or trying out new stories that explain you, you will be surprised at the wonderful outcomes you experience as new.