I am not especially happy with that first post I wrote a couple days ago on lookism. It was disjointed and I don't think my ideas came across very clearly. I realized I was thinking and writing about some very different things:
1. Lookism is analogous to racism or sexism. It is discrimination against those who do not fit the social and cultural definition of attractive. It feels crappy for me to own that I have benefited from a system of physical objectification and hierarchy.
2. Working in the strip industry is a study on lookism. While I benefit to an extent within dance culture because of my looks, I am also highly aware of when I don't (my small tits definitely work against me overall, although I have met a handful of customers who prefer small to big tits).
3. Dating, for me, makes me feel anxious
when I start questioning why I don't feel chemistry. I can't help who I
am attracted to, but I feel badly that I might not be attracted to
someone purely because of looks, no matter how awesome I find our mental
connection. Can I help it? Should I try? Am I bringing a larger social issue down to too small of a level, and into a realm that is so personal and based on indescribable feelings? I realize that discriminating against someone because they are "unattractive" is way different than simply not feeling chemistry with someone or wanting to date them.
Well, maybe I just said the same exact things I already did, but this at least feels a little more organized and coherent.