Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Wonderful Women

I had the great fortune of participating in a film discussion and screening of Bodysex. It was a really empowering to see women in the film engaging in a body positive and sex positive space, and supporting each other in loving their bodies. The clips we watched of the women admiring one another's vulvas took my by surprise: women oohed and awed over each other's, complimenting the different shapes and sizes. I loved it. And, the masturbation/self pleasure circle was pretty hot, and awesome. It was quite something to watch seven women pleasure themselves. Also, I found it wonderful and beautiful to see such different body shapes and sizes (naked). Old, young, small, large, and in between. It was a really empowering film for me to see parts of, especially in how it relates to my own body image and sexuality. I am excited about the potential of participating in a similar women's self-pleasure group (see Barbara Wynne's website to get in touch with her if you are similarly interested).

Then, a couple days later, I was so grateful to be part of the first session of an open women's group. These women are all so special and important to me, and each relationship is unique. I wouldn't give up any of these friendships for anything. Again, I found myself in such an empowering space, listening to these wonderful women talk about their experiences, their challenges and triumphs. We talked about our various relationships structures, our sexual orientations and identities, how we prefer to communicate with our partners, what some of our boundaries are, whether we have come out to our families, and what it's like to be open and to also be raising kids. We talked about jealousy (obviously) and cheating/boundary violations. One of the most lovely things to me about the space was not the similarities among us (although there were some that took me by surprise- who knew how many of us lived with family?), but the diversity of opinion and experience. From how we define "open relationship," "nonmonogamy," "polyamory" to how we conceive of sex (is it "play," about physical connection, about emotional connection?) to what we want out of our open relationships, we all had different ideas and attitudes. Again, I was amazed at the intricacies inherent in this community and felt at home feeling safe and supported despite feeling different. We supported each other, gave each other hugs, let each other cry, and made each other laugh. I feel so blessed to have so many lovely friends, and to have been part of space where we could all come together.

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